I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
