let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
