I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
