That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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