so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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