no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
i think i just lost a toe
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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