never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
