She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize