So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize