so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
