All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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