dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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