It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize