Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
