It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
