This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
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