We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Randomize