i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
