I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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