But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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