It's just like the Real World with babies
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
