8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
