We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
you never un-have a 4some
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I currently don't understand fingers.
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