turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
