You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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