I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
