My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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