You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize