My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
