Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Is that strawberry winking at me??
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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