So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
