you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
