They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
