I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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