His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Randomize
