I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Randomize
