your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
