I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
