i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
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