in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
