Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
