In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
