No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
