Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
