that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
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