I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
