i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
