You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
We smell like vodka and hangover
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