Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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