I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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